The Ultimate Real Housewives Trivia Quiz

This column originally appeared in Brian Moylan’s newsletter, The Housewives Institute Bulletin. Sign up here to be the first to read the next edition.

This column originally appeared in Brian Moylan’s newsletter, The Housewives Institute Bulletin. Sign up here to be the first to read the next edition.

At the beginning of the summer, three contestants on Jeopardy were totally stumped by the simplest question about The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Why is it that Bravo worshipers like ourselves need to know things like arithmetic, grammar, and stupid bullshit about sports when most Americans don’t even know how many sitting presidents have been to the wedding of a former Real Housewife? (Answer: One.)

To celebrate our wealth of deep knowledge about the franchise we love, I asked members of the Housewives Institute to submit their own multiple-choice trivia questions so we could come up with the ultimate test of Housewife knowledge. You sure delivered: The Institute got more than 100 questions (some of them duplicates), and from those, I’ve selected the 30 best, funniest, and sure to stump. They get progressively harder, and if you get all 30 right, you win a prize. That prize is knowing a shit ton about the Housewives. It’s worth its weight in gold.

The Ultimate Real Housewives Quiz

How many can you get right?

Which designer was responsible for Alex McCord's shoes that Luann called a "mistake"?

Herman Munster

Louis Vuitton

Christian Louboutin

Jimmy Choo

Correct. Never forget that trip to Morocco. Incorrect. Luann called them Herman Munster shoes, but they were indeed made by Louis Vuitton. According to NeNe Leakes, which color refrigerator is not acceptable?

A clear door like Yolanda Foster’s

Black

Silver

White

Correct. You can hear the GIF, can’t you? Incorrect. It was Kenya Moore’s house with a white refrigerator that NeNe made fun of. What two things did Dorinda do in order to “make it nice” for her guests at Blue Stone Manor?

Cooked and decorated

Cooked and cleaned

Decorated and shopped

Drank and napped

Correct. Congrats, you really listen. Dorinda would be happy. Incorrect. If you picked "Drank and napped," you are technically correct, but she told everyone she cooked and decorated. Designer and former RHOC cast member Lynne Curtin designs what kind of lovely accessories?

Statement necklaces

Pearl-string thong underwear

Cuff bracelets

Baby hair bows

Correct. Not the kind of cuffs that the Countess wore, mind you. Incorrect. How could you forget about the cuffs? You can still get them on her website for $148. In the RHOA premiere, Shereé throws a birthday party but “forgets” to add one of her castmates to the guest list. Which castmate was it?

DeShawn Snow

Kim Zolciak

NeNe Leakes

Lisa Wu

Correct. And thus the best of frenemies were born. Incorrect. It was NeNe. You probably don’t remember, because it’s when she had long hair. I blocked that out too. Who has had romantic relationships with the most Housewives cast members?

Slade Smiley

Will Smith

Harry Dubin

Simon Guobadia

Correct. The kissing bandit of New York strikes again. Will Smith has had two, Simon Guobadia has had two, Slade Smiley has had three, but it is Harry Dubin with four (Aviva Drescher, Luann de Lesseps, Sonja Morgan, and Ramona Singer) who wins. How many times has Danielle Staub been engaged?

None

17

19

21

Correct. This was a tricky one. Good job Incorrect. Of course, Teresa Giudice yelled she was “engaged 19 times” right before the infamous table flip, but she has been engaged two times since then for a total of 21. Where did Gretchen Rossi vacation when her fiancé was in the hospital?

Lake Tahoe

Bass Lake

Lake Mead

The Lady Pond

Correct. Named after LVP’s favorite member of NSYNC. Incorrect. If you weren’t so naked wasted, you would know that it is Bass Lake. Who was the youngest ever Real Housewife at the time of her first appearance on the show?

Whitney Rose

Ashley Darby

Meghan King Edmonds

Jo De La Rosa

Correct. This was a tricky one; you must be an RHOC OG. Incorrect. While Ashley is often cited as the youngest Housewife, Jo De La Rosa, the former almost Mrs. Slade Smiley, was only 24 way back during season one of RHOC. Which Housewife has not shit herself (at least that we know of)?

Ramona Singer

Gizelle Bryant

LeeAnne Locken

Dorinda Medley

Correct. Unless you count her shitty home renovation, it’s all Gizelle. Incorrect. Gizelle only had a shitty home renovation not actual poop anywhere outside of a toilet. Where was Vicki going when she had her epic "family van" meltdown?

On a two-and-a-half-week cruise

On vacation to Puerto Vallarta

To Chicago for a family reunion

To Andale’s to whoop it up

Correct. Wow, you are an OG just like Vicki. Incorrect. You would think it would be to her favorite place south of the border, but you would be wrong. Which restaurant, known for its cheeky take on dishes, such as Lobster Pop-Tarts served in giant toasters, has been featured on RHOC, RHOA, and RHONY?

The Carl

The Quiet Woman

Barton G.

Rails Steakhouse

Correct. "Life is not a cabaret, Luann!" —Bethenny Frankel Incorrect. It's Barton G., with outposts in L.A. and Miami, that the ladies have been to — including when Bethenny told Luann that life is not a cabaret. Which of the following Housewives has NOT thrown a glass at a castmate?

Lisa Rinna

Ramona Singer

Dorinda Medley

Brandi Glanville

Correct. She’s thrown plenty of shade, but no tableware. Incorrect. Lisa threw one at Kim Richards, Ramona threw one at Kristen Taekman, and Brandi threw one at Eileen Davidson. That leaves just Dorinda, who will shout "CLIP!" but never threw a glass. Who came up with “Blue Stone Manor” for the name of Dorinda Medley’s surely haunted Berkshires manse?

Carole Radziwill

Dorinda Medley

Bethenny Frankel

Ramona Singer

Correct. That’s why they call her “writer girl.” Incorrect. Good guess, but it was actually “writer girl” herself, Carole. Which of these was not a Kyle Richards tagline?

I’m not the richest girl in Beverly Hills, but I am the luckiest.

I’m born and raised in Beverly Hills. This is my town.

In Beverly Hills, you can be anything, but it’s most important to be yourself.

It's all fun and games in Beverly Hills as long as you're holding the winning hand.

Correct. If only she were holding the winning hand on game night. Incorrect. If only she were holding the winning hand on game night. What is the real name of the island that has been dubbed Scary Island?

St. Croix

St. John

St. Thomas

St. Lucia

Correct. “Satchels of gold, Al Sharpton. She’s a vampire!” is also an acceptable answer. Incorrect. Sorry, it’s St. John. After that visit, it sank into the sea. Which of these is not one of Heather Dubrow's IMDb credits?

Married With Children

Hawaii Five-0

CSI

Early Edition

Correct. And let us not forget Malibu Country. Incorrect. It is actually CSI, but good guess. Who is Tarzan?

Dorit's abandoned dog

A stripper Phaedra hires

Bethenny’s assistant

Joe Gorga’s penis

Correct. Who else gets that poison out? Incorrect. Nope, it’s Joe Gorga’s penis. You would think it might have a more Italian name. What is the name of the RHONY episode when Luann pleads, “Please, don’t let it be about Tom”?

"Any Tom, Dick, or Harry"

"Tomcat"

"Tomfoolery"

"Peeping Tom"

Correct. You cannot be fooled. Incorrect. Those Bravo episode namers are clever, and “Tomfoolery” wins. In season three of RHOBH, Taylor Armstrong meets Dana Wilkey for drinks. How does Dana light her cigarette?

She asks the kitchen staff to light it for her.

With her $25,000 sunglasses.

She flirts with a man to light her cigarette.

Using a candle on the table. Classy.

Correct. Come on, Dana, light our fire. Incorrect. It was a candle on the table. That’s what we loved about our Dana. Never gauche at all. “Who is Adrienne Maloof in this world?”

Someone who washes chicken with soap

Someone who has the finest of hair tinsel

Someone Yolanda Foster doesn't know (i.e, not important)

The queen of the mole people who live under the mountain

Correct. While all of the answers are correct, that is what Yolanda meant when she asked this question for us. Incorrect. While all of the answers are correct, it's clear what Yolanda meant when she asked this question. Carole Radziwill once said she only has “five good summers left.” When is that last good summer?

2018

2020

2022

2025

Correct. Liza Minnelli has outlived Carole Radziwill’s last good summer. Incorrect. She made the edict in 2015, making the horrible COVID summer of 2020 her last good one. Maybe she can get a refund. RHOC ex-husband Lou Knickerbocker started an energy-drink brand that employed several Housewives' daughters as models. What were they collectively called?

OC Angels

Aqua Angels

OC Chicks

OC Babes

Correct. I’m sure you already know that the gate of his house is still in the opening credits. Incorrect. It was the OC Angels, and they probably deserved their own reality show. Which German-born real-estate developer had confrontations with both NeNe Leakes and Mama Elsa Patton?

Thomas Kramer

Lee Najjar

Dwight Eubanks

Romain Zago

Correct. Since you know this, he probably haunts your dreams too. Incorrect. Thomas Kramer was the man with all the creepy sculptures around his house whom NeNe fought with after her famous altercation with Kim on the tour bus. Which of the following is not one of Sonja Morgan's interns?

Pickles

Connor

Matthew

Constance

Correct. Yeah, we just made Constance up. Incorrect. It was Constance. Please tell me you at least remember Pickles. Which Housewife said she could see herself winning an Oscar one day?

Heather Dubrow

Shereé Whitfield

Kandi Burruss

Luann de Lesseps

Correct. Her Oscar is coming spring, summer, spring/summer. Incorrect. Shockingly it is Shereé who had a brief flirtation with acting before realizing she was awful at it. In season seven of Brooklyn Nine-Nine, which RHONY cast member did Adrian Pimento claim to have worked for as a PI (and slept with in a tiny hotel Jacuzzi)?

Luann

Sonja

Ramona

Bethenny

Correct. Honestly, we could see it. Incorrect. The funniest one for him to be in a tiny Jacuzzi with is Countess Luann, so that is the right answer. Who was on Yolanda Foster’s "dream team"?

Kyle, Kim, LVP

Brandi, Joyce, Kim

Brandi, LVP, Carlton

Kyle, LVP, Brandi

Correct. And look at the dream team — all unemployed. Nope, it was Brandi, LVP, and Carlton, who just cast a spell on you for not getting this right. Which Housewife was once the special-guest general manager on an episode of WWE Monday Night Raw?

NeNe Leakes

Dorinda Medley

Denise Richards

Lisa Rinna

Correct. You watch wrestling and Housewives? Who even are you? Incorrect. The Housewives Institute has been informed it was NeNe. We got this one wrong too. What is the secret ingredient in Kim Richards's chicken salad?

Termite eggs from her stolen house

 Tarragon

Hellmann's

Stirring with her hands

Tarragon. Of course, tarragon. You might think it is her manual method of preparing it, but it is actually tarragon.

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The Ultimate Real Housewives Trivia Quiz

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